My Pink Roadmap

The more you find good in another, the more you'll find good in yourself.
No matter who that "other" is. Happy, happy Monday -
The Universe

A lot of changes are taking place in my life at the moment. Given, they are gradual and I tend to embrace change, I can’t help but feel a bit overwhelmed. The thought of not knowing what’s going to happen next is exciting, at the same time, a bit stressful. This is me being tested. 

I found it a bit ironic that in the midst of my turmoil yesterday evening (before I decided to take my stress out on the elliptical at the gym) I decided to use the “stumbleupon” feature on my Firefox window and the very first page it took me to was a poem by Robert Frost, “Two Roads Diverged in a Yellow Wood.” I remembered this poem from my Sophomore English class in High School and decided to look over it again: 

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
 To where it bent in the undergrowth;Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same, 
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
 Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.  
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

I found inspiration in Robert Frost’s words, a light at the end of the tunnel if you will. The poem was a reminder that life is Journey and can only be as amazing as you decide to make/let it be.

These are the moments when we need to let go, keep focused on what it is that we truly desire in life and let The Universe figure out the how’s and what-not’s. When it boils down to the nitty-gritty all we want is happiness and I already have that. This is the point in the story where I fasten my seat belt, throw my hands in the air, let my hair down and scream with excitement, for the ride of my life is just beginning and I am going to love Every Single Minute of it.

Today's Think Pink Post was written by a dear friend of mine, Leslee Horner. You can follow her writings on her blog 'Waiting for the Click' and also find her on Twitter. Leslee continues to display her bravery and courage through her writing- letting it all hang out. Rock on Pinkie, we love you!

A few weeks ago, when I was in the midst of the funk, I read a blog post by Truthwalker.  He made mention of how when he is sad porn seems like a good idea, but always leaves him empty.  I commented on the post saying that I could relate, only my “porn” seems to be the internet in general (especially Twitter, Facebook, and this blog).  I think the internet is wonderful.  There are tons of things that I could be doing online that I am not.  I have discovered and connected with a lot of excellent writers who have entertaining and informative blogs.  I could be reading those.  I am interested in using my writing talents to help others.  There are tons of resources online that I could be utilizing.  I could be researching my novel idea.  I could even be searching for conferences and workshops I’d like to attend or classes I might like to take.  I could be learning and expanding.  If that was what I was doing online I could easily excuse the hours I spend in cyber-space, but for the most part it is not.  I’d say that what I do with my time on the internet can only be described as seeking validation.

We all want to be validated.  It’s human nature and for most of us the opportunity for this validation is incorporated into our daily lives.  The majority of adults spend their days with other adults.  They get their “atta boys” and empathy/sympathy from bosses, co-workers, and friends.    I have been a stay-at-home-mom now for 5 years.  In the beginning, I was a member of a big playgroup and was with other moms almost daily.  The group was fun, loving, and supportive.  But ever since school entered the equation and the moms in my life have less time, the daily adult interaction I get mostly just happens when Mark arrives home from work.  I miss the validation.  I miss sharing myself with others (besides my husband who knows all there is to know) and being able to listen.    So I’ve recently found that the internet can provide that for me  in small doses.  The problem is I find myself surfing between email, Facebook, Twitter, and this blog.  I send an email and wait for a response.  I mention someone in a tweet and wait for a re-tweet.  I post an update on my Facebook status and wait for people to “like” it.  And finally I check and re-check my wordpress dashboard looking to see if any of my lovely readers have left me a comment.  If they do, I am validated.  If they don’t, I’m left feeling deflated.

This neediness is something I am ready to let go of.  I’m tired of thinking that my worth is measured by how many people approve of me.  I want my validation to come from some place else, some place deep inside of me.  I want to put my thoughts on paper (or computer screen) and not give a shit if anyone is reading them.  I want to tell my truth and not care if anyone accepts  it.  I want to be convinced from within that I am enough.  That’s a click worth waiting for….

Here’s a wonderful video someone posted in their comment!  It’s about 15 minutes long, but worth the watch.

What about you Pinkies? Is there an area of your life where you need to be validated in order to like you mission is complete? What parts of your life do you seek approval in order to feel appreciated?